Ahh, the days when you could describe a groundbreaking masterpiece with, "It's Terrific!"
I WAS WATCHING THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK last night, and I smiled at how cheap the Blockbusters of my youth look today. I had just noticed how The Imperial Cruiser's inner doors *bounce* slightly when closing, as the set was obviously made of plywood. I also enjoyed how implausible R2D2's movements were in Dagobah's rainforest, because the robot was on wheels - which would have never rolled in the mud, a fact that was reinforced when Luke struggled with R2's weight, after Nessie spat him out like a snot-rocket. Add to that, the writing was full of cliches. Han & Lea's forced love story? - Yecch. The way Fisher got thrown into Han Solo's arms (in the monster cave) was straight from a sitcom, or an old episode of Star Trek where explosions were bolstered by shaking the camera. In addition, the movie's dialogue is God-awful. LEAH: (Batting her eyes at Solo): "You're a scoundrel, and I only like nice men." SOLO: (Leaning in for a kiss) - "Oh, I think you like scoundrels, Princess. Are you afraid to get your hands dirty?" Again, yecch! And though I respect Lucas's audacity of making Yoda a "Muppet," did he reeeeeeally have to give the puppet the voice of Kermit & Piggy's unholy offspring? Furthermore, C3Po was just a bitch ...
Thirty-nine years earlier, Orson Welles faced a similar issue when filming CITIZEN KANE. Like the Star Wars movies, A New Hope in particular, Welles had to tell a staggering story on a shoestring budget. But as Hitchcock did with 1940's Foreign Correspondent's crash scene, Orson was fucking brilliant when it came to making grand-on-a-shoestring special effects seem believable. My favorite moment happened when reporter Jerry Thompson is allowed access to the archive of Walter Parks Thatcher, to research Charles Foster Kane. The underground chamber appears to be made of concrete, but in reality, the whole thing was built with styrofoam or something; the "effect" of a bunker was completely done through sound effects, with dialogue that "echoed," and the deliberate insertion of footsteps on polished granite. (Chuckling...there were no "bouncy" doors in sight.) Additional tricks were used in other scenes, like the clever "lighting effect" when Kane stands to clap after Susan's disastrous opera performance (while watching the show, Charles appears well-lit, but when standing to clap, his face goes dark in the shadows), and too many neatly-staged camera shots to mention. Film Connoisseurs know that in order to truly appreciate a movie, you must first imagine yourself living in the project's era: "Okay, so it's 1941, and Hitler was threatening Europe. Newspapers & radio were the two main news sources, and though films were creative, their special-effects technology was primitive. As Citizen Kane was modeled after Randolph Hearst, this was a commentary on his media empire, political aspirations, and of course, his massive mansion. Now, you take all that in account, and throw in Orson Welles - who was riding high after his War of the Worlds broadcast." You must consider the time before watching the movie, and if you do, you'll truly appreciate what masterpieces both Citizen Kane & The Empire Strikes Back really are.
Thirty-nine years earlier, Orson Welles faced a similar issue when filming CITIZEN KANE. Like the Star Wars movies, A New Hope in particular, Welles had to tell a staggering story on a shoestring budget. But as Hitchcock did with 1940's Foreign Correspondent's crash scene, Orson was fucking brilliant when it came to making grand-on-a-shoestring special effects seem believable. My favorite moment happened when reporter Jerry Thompson is allowed access to the archive of Walter Parks Thatcher, to research Charles Foster Kane. The underground chamber appears to be made of concrete, but in reality, the whole thing was built with styrofoam or something; the "effect" of a bunker was completely done through sound effects, with dialogue that "echoed," and the deliberate insertion of footsteps on polished granite. (Chuckling...there were no "bouncy" doors in sight.) Additional tricks were used in other scenes, like the clever "lighting effect" when Kane stands to clap after Susan's disastrous opera performance (while watching the show, Charles appears well-lit, but when standing to clap, his face goes dark in the shadows), and too many neatly-staged camera shots to mention. Film Connoisseurs know that in order to truly appreciate a movie, you must first imagine yourself living in the project's era: "Okay, so it's 1941, and Hitler was threatening Europe. Newspapers & radio were the two main news sources, and though films were creative, their special-effects technology was primitive. As Citizen Kane was modeled after Randolph Hearst, this was a commentary on his media empire, political aspirations, and of course, his massive mansion. Now, you take all that in account, and throw in Orson Welles - who was riding high after his War of the Worlds broadcast." You must consider the time before watching the movie, and if you do, you'll truly appreciate what masterpieces both Citizen Kane & The Empire Strikes Back really are.
Biden, B4 Hunter's cocaine kicks in. Going back to A New Hope, my friend Paul reminded me of the "Klosterman-esque hypotheticals about the practicality of the processes." (Chuckling - you might want to Google that; the comment was in regards to McSweeney's piece: "On the Implausibilty of the Death Star's Trash Compactor."). He brought up that fact that in the first Star Wars movie, the whole franchise could have been avoided had the Death Star just blown up Yavin, rather than orbit around it to get to the rebel base moon - BOOM! I told him that I felt the exact same way when Jeffery Dean Morgan first appeared on The Walking Dead. The *very* 1st time we see Negan, he's silhouetted/illuminated behind a cloth or something - with his leather jacket & barbed-wire bat slung over his shoulder. Morgan sloooooowly walks around the corner, taunting Rick & the gang with some twisted soliloquy - all while our heroes literally watched w/guns in their hands. I remember yelling: "JUST SHOOT HIM!" I mean, why not take care of the problem now, you know? Sure, AMC would have lost the next four seasons, but the show went on for too long anyway. (It got to the point where I was rooting for the zombies.). Besides, can you imagine how cool Morgan's brain matter would have looked when *splattered* all over the sheets -🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸
🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 ?
🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 🩸 ?
I genuinely believe that if MTV returned to music videos & exclusive concerts (instead of all the "Buckwild" reality bullshit), the channel would become relevant again. In my previous blog, I wrote about the film "Radioland Murders," and how fun live, scripted radio serials must have been in the 30s. My generation had a similar spectacle: Music Television - I WANT MY MTV! I used to enjoy coming home from the leather bars in the wee hours, then turning on Music TV to wind down from the night. Nowadays, I've switched to YouTube channels of course, where the hits of the 80s/90s are available on hour-long playlists. But I don't just watch the oldies, I purposely look for newer stuff, as I refuse to get stuck in the past. Like an old movie with dated special effects, the music videos currently available are much more elaborate, as technology has gotten better. There was so...much...creativity in music & films these days, it's almost hard to fathom. As a man of a certain age, I feel it's crucial that, in order to stay "young," it's important to actively pay attention to what's happening in the ART of the youth. And I don't just mean what's occurring in music, film, and the TikTok-y apps, I'm talking about what's happening in the world - the things that we only see *hinted* at in the media. With that in mind, here's an excerpt from my 1/3/2017 Blog Archive, from Trump's first term in office; it's about "Jaka Parker," a man who secretly recorded daily North Korean life, and posted it on YouTube:
"... Anyway, with camera recording, the viewer follows Jaka Parker down streets, through urban pedestrian tunnels, across intersections with more bikes than cars, and down miles and miles of colorless boulevards lined with bleak, identical, Orwellian apartment buildings. Unlike footage of soldiers marching though the People's Square, Jaka's videos capture the monotony of North Korean life - a world void of joy. There are no corner coffee shops or breakfast diners with neon-trimmed windows. There are no 7-Elevens, and certainly no 24-hour superstores with parking lots full of cars. There are no glowing Coke/Pepsi machines, no twinkling LED advertisements, no lines outside the Taco Bell drive-thru. There is no "entertainment" of any kind - in the windows of buildings, or anywhere on the street - unless you count the billboards of Kim, Kim, and Kim painted within images of Soviet bounty above empty shops and grocery stores. Jaka Parker has captured the "genuine" North Korea, cold & comfortless, repetitive & gray ..."
Can you just imagine? Living a life void of color, art, music - and hope? I wrote about living in poverty in my last post, but even my crappy old house is fun to come home to, and there's always something of interest happening in my neighborhood. I'd discussed North Korea in many of my blogs over the years, but Jaka Parker's videos really hit me hard when I realized what they were *actually* saying: "Please world - Help us! We're trapped in bondage by a repressive regime, and we live in a country with no JOY!" I couldn't help but think of the modern Democratic Party, and how its steadily-lowering standards has caused us to - as Robert H. Bork said in his 1996 book - "Slouch Towards Gomorrah." I see this everywhere I look; it's like a frog slowly boiling in water. Liberals don't realize that by "leveling the playing field so everyone can participate," they're killing the *hope* of the youth of today, which destroys the country from within. I remember Rush Limbaugh talking about this on his show, coupled with Paul Shanklin's parody: 🎶"We all live in a mellow apathy..."🎶 As a man of creativity, I think that's why Parker's videos hit me so hard: This is what's happening within our own country right now, as liberal apathy enables the slow erosion of hope & joy - destroying the *spark* of inspiration. But even worse is the cruelty this causes, as the youth of today is led to believe that the JOY of American excellence (which, quite frankly, comes from Conservative values) isn't politically correct. God put the United States on this world for a reason, a beacon of strength, freedom, excellence, and hope - and it's hard not to notice that Jaka Parker's videos are meant for an American audience. They are, sadly, a desperate cry for help that we are currently unable to answer - particularly with the Biden administration.
"... Anyway, with camera recording, the viewer follows Jaka Parker down streets, through urban pedestrian tunnels, across intersections with more bikes than cars, and down miles and miles of colorless boulevards lined with bleak, identical, Orwellian apartment buildings. Unlike footage of soldiers marching though the People's Square, Jaka's videos capture the monotony of North Korean life - a world void of joy. There are no corner coffee shops or breakfast diners with neon-trimmed windows. There are no 7-Elevens, and certainly no 24-hour superstores with parking lots full of cars. There are no glowing Coke/Pepsi machines, no twinkling LED advertisements, no lines outside the Taco Bell drive-thru. There is no "entertainment" of any kind - in the windows of buildings, or anywhere on the street - unless you count the billboards of Kim, Kim, and Kim painted within images of Soviet bounty above empty shops and grocery stores. Jaka Parker has captured the "genuine" North Korea, cold & comfortless, repetitive & gray ..."
Can you just imagine? Living a life void of color, art, music - and hope? I wrote about living in poverty in my last post, but even my crappy old house is fun to come home to, and there's always something of interest happening in my neighborhood. I'd discussed North Korea in many of my blogs over the years, but Jaka Parker's videos really hit me hard when I realized what they were *actually* saying: "Please world - Help us! We're trapped in bondage by a repressive regime, and we live in a country with no JOY!" I couldn't help but think of the modern Democratic Party, and how its steadily-lowering standards has caused us to - as Robert H. Bork said in his 1996 book - "Slouch Towards Gomorrah." I see this everywhere I look; it's like a frog slowly boiling in water. Liberals don't realize that by "leveling the playing field so everyone can participate," they're killing the *hope* of the youth of today, which destroys the country from within. I remember Rush Limbaugh talking about this on his show, coupled with Paul Shanklin's parody: 🎶"We all live in a mellow apathy..."🎶 As a man of creativity, I think that's why Parker's videos hit me so hard: This is what's happening within our own country right now, as liberal apathy enables the slow erosion of hope & joy - destroying the *spark* of inspiration. But even worse is the cruelty this causes, as the youth of today is led to believe that the JOY of American excellence (which, quite frankly, comes from Conservative values) isn't politically correct. God put the United States on this world for a reason, a beacon of strength, freedom, excellence, and hope - and it's hard not to notice that Jaka Parker's videos are meant for an American audience. They are, sadly, a desperate cry for help that we are currently unable to answer - particularly with the Biden administration.
The Audacity of Hope I love the old Star Wars films because of their message that HOPE is not only the Force that unites is, but it's also a goal that we must fight to achieve. Despite what Liberals may want us to believe, success in life doesn't come from a safe-space, it derives from our Orson Welles willingness to take chances - and to challenge the status quo. I also love how the movies "matured" as they went on, exactly like Harry Potter books. The films got bigger budgets and technology vastly improved over their 42-year run; by the time the series was finished (not counting all the spin-off movies, which are still in production), their revenue equated to over ten billion dollars, making George Lucas the very definition of "The American Success Story." One can only imagine what Welles might have accomplished, had he been alive today. As a writer myself, I appreciate the ART of these films...that is, the *spark* of creativity that took a scruffy little film (I mean, the 77' Death Star interior looks like Lucas assembled it from the Ace Hardware electrical department, for Christ's sake!) and saw the potential of countless movies, a $32,000,000,000 merchandise franchise, and a grand story arc that once it was finished, rivals When People Go Away. Impressive. Especially as Lucas describes himself as "a radical liberal" who doesn't believe in the "capitalist democracy" that seems to have made him Trump-rich. I mean, with all the money the guy has made, how can he have the *audacity* to even SAY that...?
With that in mind, here's an excerpt from my 9/22/2016 Blog Archive, regarding Ann Coulter's appearance on Rob Lowe's Comedy Central roast:
"... So, I finally got around to watching Comedy Central's roast of Rob Lowe - and I was absolutely horrified by the treatment of Ann Coulter. Her presence on the dais was clearly a set-up, and as the roasters delivered jokes, there were more Coulter/cunt insults then there were snipes about Soda Pop's sex tapes - or Lowe's perpetual Death Becomes Her looks. I happen to like Ann Coulter. She's a wickedly funny/intelligent lady. And I'm sure she knew that by appearing at the event, she she'd be conservative catnip in a den of liberal lions - more of a target than Lowe, himself. But what genuinely shocked me were the moments of silence when the camera panned the audience during her set. The crowd was...seething. You could feel their anger like radiant heat. They hated Ann Coulter like jihadists hate infidels, and their heart-stopping glares - and refusal to acknowledge a single point she made - marked the first time I truly understood the ideology that separates Clinton and Trump supporters. It scared the hell out of me ... "
It's sad when you realize that those that preach tolerance are often the most intolerant of all. And it's even sadder to learn how deep this intolerance runs, especially within the creative community. People don't realize the *importance* of creativity, as it's just as crucial to math, science, and spirituality - as it is for ART. Without the *spark* of inspiration, no one would have realized that mold creates penicillin - or that space travel could be achieved by 1969, when The Fifth Dimension sang Age of Aquarius. But we'll never truly reach cosmic enlightenment until we solve our problems on Earth. If we fail to learn basic lessons like accepting each other's belief systems, we'll never survive the era of quantum computing & interstellar travel to experience our Manifest Destiny: Humanity is meant to achieve Time Travel in 1000 years, as we gain an understanding of the many dimensions that already exist around us.
For me, this time is magical.
With that in mind, here's an excerpt from my 9/22/2016 Blog Archive, regarding Ann Coulter's appearance on Rob Lowe's Comedy Central roast:
"... So, I finally got around to watching Comedy Central's roast of Rob Lowe - and I was absolutely horrified by the treatment of Ann Coulter. Her presence on the dais was clearly a set-up, and as the roasters delivered jokes, there were more Coulter/cunt insults then there were snipes about Soda Pop's sex tapes - or Lowe's perpetual Death Becomes Her looks. I happen to like Ann Coulter. She's a wickedly funny/intelligent lady. And I'm sure she knew that by appearing at the event, she she'd be conservative catnip in a den of liberal lions - more of a target than Lowe, himself. But what genuinely shocked me were the moments of silence when the camera panned the audience during her set. The crowd was...seething. You could feel their anger like radiant heat. They hated Ann Coulter like jihadists hate infidels, and their heart-stopping glares - and refusal to acknowledge a single point she made - marked the first time I truly understood the ideology that separates Clinton and Trump supporters. It scared the hell out of me ... "
It's sad when you realize that those that preach tolerance are often the most intolerant of all. And it's even sadder to learn how deep this intolerance runs, especially within the creative community. People don't realize the *importance* of creativity, as it's just as crucial to math, science, and spirituality - as it is for ART. Without the *spark* of inspiration, no one would have realized that mold creates penicillin - or that space travel could be achieved by 1969, when The Fifth Dimension sang Age of Aquarius. But we'll never truly reach cosmic enlightenment until we solve our problems on Earth. If we fail to learn basic lessons like accepting each other's belief systems, we'll never survive the era of quantum computing & interstellar travel to experience our Manifest Destiny: Humanity is meant to achieve Time Travel in 1000 years, as we gain an understanding of the many dimensions that already exist around us.
For me, this time is magical.
In the name of Love... Back in 1990, Jesus Jones sang:
🎶"A woman on the radio talks about revolution, when it's already passed her by...🎶...Bob Dylan didn't have this to sing about, you know it's good to feel alive!...🎶... I was alive and I waited, waited...🎶...I was alive and I waited for this...🎶...Right here, right now...🎶...there is no other place I want to be...🎶...Right here, right now...🎶...Watching the world wake up from history!"🎶
The first time I heard the song, I got the same chills as Moby's "Signs of Love." From Citizen Kane's bygone newspaper era to Star Wars' depiction of galactic majesty, the world of ART is filled with foreshadowing of the people we're about to become. Everyone thinks humanity's next phase of Evolution will take as many eons as the first, but that's not the case at all. People forget that we went from horseback to space travel in just 69 years, a testament to our species creativity - and the spark of inspiration that leads to great ideas. This is why I find it so hard to fathom that we're fighting against our nature - and God's Intelligent Design.
You see, change is happening all around us, but we're so preoccupied with destructive matters like Political Correctness that we're failing to see it. Nobody's even noticed that God created an entirely new color palate, a prism that we're unable to see without better technology. Humanity has mistaken "spirituality" for "religious dogma," and that is holding us back. People must realize the Almighty is technology, the Divine source code that binds all matter in the Universe - God's first *spark* of the creative inspiration for life ... ✨
I have a dream that the day will come when we all join hands in love. For it's the hand of God that humanity must embrace, to lift us UP into the Heavens - and to the joy that lays beyond.
It's the Audacity of a New Hope. 💫
- Sir Dave
🎶"A woman on the radio talks about revolution, when it's already passed her by...🎶...Bob Dylan didn't have this to sing about, you know it's good to feel alive!...🎶... I was alive and I waited, waited...🎶...I was alive and I waited for this...🎶...Right here, right now...🎶...there is no other place I want to be...🎶...Right here, right now...🎶...Watching the world wake up from history!"🎶
The first time I heard the song, I got the same chills as Moby's "Signs of Love." From Citizen Kane's bygone newspaper era to Star Wars' depiction of galactic majesty, the world of ART is filled with foreshadowing of the people we're about to become. Everyone thinks humanity's next phase of Evolution will take as many eons as the first, but that's not the case at all. People forget that we went from horseback to space travel in just 69 years, a testament to our species creativity - and the spark of inspiration that leads to great ideas. This is why I find it so hard to fathom that we're fighting against our nature - and God's Intelligent Design.
You see, change is happening all around us, but we're so preoccupied with destructive matters like Political Correctness that we're failing to see it. Nobody's even noticed that God created an entirely new color palate, a prism that we're unable to see without better technology. Humanity has mistaken "spirituality" for "religious dogma," and that is holding us back. People must realize the Almighty is technology, the Divine source code that binds all matter in the Universe - God's first *spark* of the creative inspiration for life ... ✨
I have a dream that the day will come when we all join hands in love. For it's the hand of God that humanity must embrace, to lift us UP into the Heavens - and to the joy that lays beyond.
It's the Audacity of a New Hope. 💫
- Sir Dave