Morality, with the subtlety of a sledge hammer.
So I'm sitting in a Community of Christ service again, listening to a sermon that made my head spin. The theme was pretty standard for church - all races are branches that grow from the same tree - but rather than talking about big Mormon oaks, the Pastor made his point with two puppets: one with blue stripes, and one with red polka dots. "The blue puppet didn't like the red puppet, and visa-versa. Now, pay attention children because this morality message is as subtle as the Bele & Lokai Star Trek episode." I had to consciously swallow my laughter when the puppets realized the hands shoved up their asses were connected to arms that came out of the same torso. "We're both the same!" they squealed. "We're both being fisted by the same God!" And best of all, by the time the story was over, the Pastor had somehow managed to connect the puppets to his golf game. Christ, I love this church!
All jokes aside, I've come to enjoy Sunday church because of its feeling of "community." I don't go often - most of my Sundays are spent at work or sleeping in - but I try to attend some type of service at least four times a year, to remind myself of how the faithful think. Having originally been raised Catholic - and having attended Catholic school in the 70s/80s - I'd already explored both Unitarian & Calvary churches before my recent visits to the Community of Christ. It's hard to say which denomination I liked best. Calvary had the best music, the COC had the best potlucks, and the Catholic church had the best backstory - including Christopher Reeve in Monsignor. I found the Unitarian church offensive - particularly with a Pastor's behavior following a family member's suicide - but all in all most churches mean well, and that's why heathens like myself go back. Especially since "Burning Man" is such a long drive away.
All jokes aside, I've come to enjoy Sunday church because of its feeling of "community." I don't go often - most of my Sundays are spent at work or sleeping in - but I try to attend some type of service at least four times a year, to remind myself of how the faithful think. Having originally been raised Catholic - and having attended Catholic school in the 70s/80s - I'd already explored both Unitarian & Calvary churches before my recent visits to the Community of Christ. It's hard to say which denomination I liked best. Calvary had the best music, the COC had the best potlucks, and the Catholic church had the best backstory - including Christopher Reeve in Monsignor. I found the Unitarian church offensive - particularly with a Pastor's behavior following a family member's suicide - but all in all most churches mean well, and that's why heathens like myself go back. Especially since "Burning Man" is such a long drive away.
From the people who brought us Benghazi... Speaking of men burning, last week marked the Ferguson verdict - and the riots & fires that followed. The violence came as no surprise; the national media had been fanning the flames for weeks and that inevitably led to the appearance of Al Sharpton, a "Reverend" as trustworthy as Boardwalk Empire's "Dr. Valentin Narcisse." Watching the footage made me angry. Whether you agree with the verdict or not, throwing bricks through liquor store windows is a shameful way for adults to behave - no matter what their color. And the video of local church leaders wasn't very much better, with Reverends & Pastors condemning the grand jury - but always stopping short from discouraging parishioners from torching police cars. Seriously, clergymen. Maybe Monday wasn't the smartest evening service to go heavy on the communal wine. When your congregation is obviously volatile, the last thing that you should do is serve them a flammable refreshment.
I've often imagined what such violence would be like in Aurora, my heavily Hispanic hometown. We have a potentially disruptive mix here - drunks, white trash, union Democrats, blacks, Mexicans, nosey neighbors, and aging gay men - but even our hottest local issues haven't led to violence. And that's really surprising because everyone knows that Chicago's suburbs have a healthy share of drug busts & gang shootings. Not a day goes by when I don't hear passing cars' rap music, and judging by the number of Sunday morning passerby carrying black plastic bags, there must be at least one liquor store that's open early on weekends. Yet, we're a docile lot. Even when Republicans inadvertently win elections. You'd think that we'd toss at least a few Molotov cocktails into our Denny's & Popeye's Chicken, but to be completely honest, Aurora's local churches would never support that. We've worked too hard to gentrify our old community ... and even when Blagojevich got convicted, the Communinidad de Iglesia de Cristo would never have allowed us to set our cars on fire.
I've often imagined what such violence would be like in Aurora, my heavily Hispanic hometown. We have a potentially disruptive mix here - drunks, white trash, union Democrats, blacks, Mexicans, nosey neighbors, and aging gay men - but even our hottest local issues haven't led to violence. And that's really surprising because everyone knows that Chicago's suburbs have a healthy share of drug busts & gang shootings. Not a day goes by when I don't hear passing cars' rap music, and judging by the number of Sunday morning passerby carrying black plastic bags, there must be at least one liquor store that's open early on weekends. Yet, we're a docile lot. Even when Republicans inadvertently win elections. You'd think that we'd toss at least a few Molotov cocktails into our Denny's & Popeye's Chicken, but to be completely honest, Aurora's local churches would never support that. We've worked too hard to gentrify our old community ... and even when Blagojevich got convicted, the Communinidad de Iglesia de Cristo would never have allowed us to set our cars on fire.
Be-Coz of the wonderful things he doz! It's no secret that I'm a Republican, and FoxNews & Drudge tend to be my first stops for news. I've also listened to Limbaugh off & on for nearly two decades, and when Thomas Sowell guest-hosted Rush's show, he'd often reference Bill Cosby as a voice of reason within the black community. Cosby used to speak with a strong conservative voice, and he had a great way of putting black angst into perspective within the larger context. He was loved, articulate, and his views went against almost everything said by current black leaders. Cosby spoke of personal responsibility - and looking within one's self for answers, rather than towards others for blame.
I couldn't help but wonder what Cosby might have said in regards to the Ferguson verdict...but of course, that couldn't happen. His growing rape allegations mirror the British women who came forward after Jimmy Savile's death. What...a loss. And not just of a television star, but of one of the only spokesmen within the black community who's life experience commanded respect. It sickens me to think that Cosby's voice is gone, while Al Sharpton's & Jessie Jackson's are not. We forgave liberal Jackson's corruption (including a former state senator son who's sitting in prison), and we forgave liberal Sharpton's shameless rabel rousing - and complete and total lack of qualifications for any public office. But we can't even think about forgiving conservative Bill Cosby? Probably not, I guess. Cosby must be held accountable if his past behavior is proven - but it's a goddamn shame that crimes against the public aren't considered as serious as those against individuals. Both crimes ruin peoples' lives, and both make great covers on national magazines. But if the Cos isn't allowed to preach restraint & intelligence, then why the hell are Jackson, Sharpton, and others of similar caliber even taken seriously when they run towards the news cameras? Now, that's something that deserves a riot...
I couldn't help but wonder what Cosby might have said in regards to the Ferguson verdict...but of course, that couldn't happen. His growing rape allegations mirror the British women who came forward after Jimmy Savile's death. What...a loss. And not just of a television star, but of one of the only spokesmen within the black community who's life experience commanded respect. It sickens me to think that Cosby's voice is gone, while Al Sharpton's & Jessie Jackson's are not. We forgave liberal Jackson's corruption (including a former state senator son who's sitting in prison), and we forgave liberal Sharpton's shameless rabel rousing - and complete and total lack of qualifications for any public office. But we can't even think about forgiving conservative Bill Cosby? Probably not, I guess. Cosby must be held accountable if his past behavior is proven - but it's a goddamn shame that crimes against the public aren't considered as serious as those against individuals. Both crimes ruin peoples' lives, and both make great covers on national magazines. But if the Cos isn't allowed to preach restraint & intelligence, then why the hell are Jackson, Sharpton, and others of similar caliber even taken seriously when they run towards the news cameras? Now, that's something that deserves a riot...
Atkins, anyone? Also, since this blog has taken a political turn, is anyone out there actually happy with Obama's response to Ferguson? To me, I'd think that the first black President would have taken this opportunity to try and unite our country's citizens - or at least to have spoken to protesters directly, with a speech as crafted as his explanation for immigration. All Presidents have their defining moments, with events that happen unexpectedly - no time to prepare. "Character" is a leader's true legacy. How he/she handles crisis should be equally important as the policies left behind. But all I see is gum-chewing. And the media's preoccupation with the latest homeland fiasco. I may be an agnostic, but sometimes I pray for the Kanamits to show up on the White House lawn. At least someone would take the opportunity To Serve Man for the greater good...
Speaking of serving man, after last week's Community of Christ service we all filed downstairs into the church basement - and shared an early Thanksgiving potluck together. I'm slowly getting to know these people, and though I've only attended three services with the group, I've witnessed a surprising assortment of people ... from kids, to families, to longtime parishioners passing out candy ... and even a transgender guest speaker, the subject of a previous blog post. The feeling of "community" is incredible within this tiny little church, and the coworker who invited me explained the church's history:
"We're a new congregation within an old building," my coworker explained. "And most of our original members are too old to come to services. But we've grown very progressive. Everybody is welcome. Sex, color, gender identity, or lifestyle...it doesn't matter." My coworker went on to explain the church's different functions, charities, and how as a Mormon sect, most everyone participates. As I looked towards the alter - and to the female Pastor whose dress was straight from BIG LOVE - I couldn't help but chuckle when I thought of the very first speaker I'd witnessed: a woman with an Adam's Apple, and a skirt with 6" heels.
I can barely open my mouth at AA meetings, so I doubt I'll ever be the one who delivers the weekly message. But still it is a little fun to imagine "me" at the pulpit, speaking while wearing my occasional Saturday night attire - straight from the movie Cruising.
Chuckling...that would be a riot.
"We're a new congregation within an old building," my coworker explained. "And most of our original members are too old to come to services. But we've grown very progressive. Everybody is welcome. Sex, color, gender identity, or lifestyle...it doesn't matter." My coworker went on to explain the church's different functions, charities, and how as a Mormon sect, most everyone participates. As I looked towards the alter - and to the female Pastor whose dress was straight from BIG LOVE - I couldn't help but chuckle when I thought of the very first speaker I'd witnessed: a woman with an Adam's Apple, and a skirt with 6" heels.
I can barely open my mouth at AA meetings, so I doubt I'll ever be the one who delivers the weekly message. But still it is a little fun to imagine "me" at the pulpit, speaking while wearing my occasional Saturday night attire - straight from the movie Cruising.
Chuckling...that would be a riot.
