The no less than absolutely stunning, Boeing 747-8
From books like Crichton's Airframe & Follet's Night Over Water, to shows like National Geographic's Air Crash Investigation, I'm always on the hunt for stories about flying. I love airplanes, the bigger the better - and I always pay attention to what model plane ride in. Over the past ten years I've learned how commercial jets work, and I think they're no less than absolutely amazing - with all their interconnected computers and thousands of moving parts. Jumbo jets are especially so, considering the engineering that goes into building them. Sure, NASA might send rockets into space - but with the exception of the shuttle, their vehicles are typically designed to be used only once. A Boeing 707 will literally last tens of thousands of flights, so long as it receives proper maintenance - and its pilot doesn't pull a Denzel Washington while flying through geese in Malaysia. Think about that. Even the most expensive cars rarely make it past a few hundred thousand miles. Yet, whenever you see a 747 in the sky, chances are it has clocked millions of miles/flight hours in its lifetime. Chuckling...despite regular trips to Jiffy Lube, I've never had a car last last a fraction of that long.
Legs distract from the background jalopy. Speaking planes with lots of miles, these past few months have included many stories describing North Korea's Air Koryo passenger airline. Apparently Air Koryo is the world's only "one star" airline, but that's mainly due to the age of its fleet - and lack of modern safety equipment. Yes, its airplanes are beautifully maintained - like attending an antique car show where a 57' Nomad sits shiny in the sun - but there's something unsettling when vintage aircraft are used to move daily passengers. When an old Packard stalls, it quietly coasts to the side of the road and its occupants enjoy a picnic while the driver calls Triple A. But when a 1957 Soviet Ilyushin II-8 stalls, "gentle" is the last word to describe its journey back to the ground.
All jokes aside, the newest adventure for North Korean visitors are aviation enthusiast tours to ride Air Koryo's stunningly well-maintained fleet. With planes straight from the Mad Men era, passengers can enjoy time traveling in old turboprops - with cockpits that somehow operate without a single digital display. Like Cubans who've kept their 49' DeSotos running, Air Koryo keeps its 59' Antonov An-24's looking showroom - new, with fresh coats of Dear Leader's Turtle Wax to hide the metal fatigue cracks. The fact that these planes still get off the ground at all is admittedly a testament to the North Korean people, working like MacGyver, fashioning engine parts out of scrap. I suppose that's part of the thrill of a DPRK aviation tour: Will I get to finish my fruit cocktail before one of the propellers snaps off, taking out hydraulics in the tail section? Whatever the case, if the stewardess serves you enough Kim Jong-Ale, you won't give a damn how rough the landing is - or whether your traveling companions got sucked out a window like Goldfinger. God knows that your pilot probably feels the same.
All jokes aside, the newest adventure for North Korean visitors are aviation enthusiast tours to ride Air Koryo's stunningly well-maintained fleet. With planes straight from the Mad Men era, passengers can enjoy time traveling in old turboprops - with cockpits that somehow operate without a single digital display. Like Cubans who've kept their 49' DeSotos running, Air Koryo keeps its 59' Antonov An-24's looking showroom - new, with fresh coats of Dear Leader's Turtle Wax to hide the metal fatigue cracks. The fact that these planes still get off the ground at all is admittedly a testament to the North Korean people, working like MacGyver, fashioning engine parts out of scrap. I suppose that's part of the thrill of a DPRK aviation tour: Will I get to finish my fruit cocktail before one of the propellers snaps off, taking out hydraulics in the tail section? Whatever the case, if the stewardess serves you enough Kim Jong-Ale, you won't give a damn how rough the landing is - or whether your traveling companions got sucked out a window like Goldfinger. God knows that your pilot probably feels the same.
A 1950s-era Air Koryo cockpit. Modern day jumbo jets are almost impossible to crash, with triple redundant safety systems & computers watching everything from engine performance to how many cans of Schlitz are stocked on the drink cart. Ultra-modern planes have what are known as "glass cockpits" - consoles full of digital displays, rather than analog dials. So many manufacturers brag that their planes are so computerized, they almost fly themselves - and that's particularly true for AirBus, a European company whose sales have recently eclipsed Boeing's. Airbusses have become so dependent on computers, their cockpits even lack the traditional center console of throttle controls. In automotive terms, comparing an Airbus to Boeing is like comparing a Prius's digital dashboard to the gleaming gauges of a new Cadillac. Both get passengers to where they need to go, but each delivers a completely different experiences for the driver. I want my pilots to be able to physically grab the throttle lever, as though they were driving a Caddy STS - and had to slam into four-wheel drive, to safely navigate a microburst. Air Crash Investigation has told many stories of Airbus's crashing because their pilots didn't understand the plane's instrumentation - and didn't know how to override the computer's distrust of the Captain. I don't know about you, but if my plane gets in trouble, I'd much rather my pilots be able to - literally - take the situation by the throttle levers, and to not have to explain their actions to the cockpit's HAL 9000. And sure, Boeings crash too ... I don't mean to single out Airbus ... but when a 737 nosedives into a Cracker Barrel, it's typically because of some amazingly stupid pilot error. And pilot error, in my opinion, is a far better way to go.
So, North Korea - in conjunction with Air Koyro - now has a jumbo-jet, which they claim rivals Air Force One. Again, it's a Russian Ilyushin, a Cold War relic that should have been grounded with the Soviet Union ... but after a passenger cabin face-lift (and a fresh coat of paint over the fuselage's Ch-AIR-Nobyl logo, it's apparently ready to shuttle around Dear Leader - and his entourage of generals, taking notes in Moleskines.
The Soviet Ilyushins are amazing machines, the airplane equivalent of a 64' Buick Electra. Yes, the interior is awash in Corinthian Leather - but the fuselage was designed in the mid 1960s, with cutting-edge technology from the Kennedy administration. We all know that Air Force One is a state-of-the-art 747, and that even in it's incredible present state, it's still going to be replaced by an a newer 747-8 within a couple of years. As an American, I don't mean to brag ; I understand that leaders of several other countries are probably riding in James Bond planes as we speak. But that being said - in keeping with my ongoing observation of North Korea - who else chuckles that Kim Jong-Un flies circles around Pyongyang's apartments in a quad-tail engine Soviet-era plane? Especially when it's trailing a banner: "Please send us FOOD & JET FUEL ... but don't you dare balloon us copies of "The Interview," otherwise you'll endure the wrath of merciless repercussions."
The Soviet Ilyushins are amazing machines, the airplane equivalent of a 64' Buick Electra. Yes, the interior is awash in Corinthian Leather - but the fuselage was designed in the mid 1960s, with cutting-edge technology from the Kennedy administration. We all know that Air Force One is a state-of-the-art 747, and that even in it's incredible present state, it's still going to be replaced by an a newer 747-8 within a couple of years. As an American, I don't mean to brag ; I understand that leaders of several other countries are probably riding in James Bond planes as we speak. But that being said - in keeping with my ongoing observation of North Korea - who else chuckles that Kim Jong-Un flies circles around Pyongyang's apartments in a quad-tail engine Soviet-era plane? Especially when it's trailing a banner: "Please send us FOOD & JET FUEL ... but don't you dare balloon us copies of "The Interview," otherwise you'll endure the wrath of merciless repercussions."
Sixty-five years ago, after lessons learned from the De Havilland Comets, modern jet travel came of age. We set a new standard for modern air-passenger service ... and, most importantly, we learned about metal fatigue - and how important safety is to keeping jets in the air. Today's jets are the safest way to travel, and accidents are few and far between. Air crashes occur a fraction as often as automobile accidents, and even old planes have a better safety record than cars.
Again, I love air travel. I love everything about the experience. I love finding tickets online, getting up early to make a morning flight, and I love sitting by the window, watching the engines roar - and the wings find lift. Modern air travel is one of the things that makes me proud to be alive, and after watching 15 seasons of Air Crash Investigation, I'm confident that - whenever I board a plane - I'll arrive at my destination intact, rested, and holding a baggage voucher. I don't have the courage to attempt an Air Koyro "aviation enthusiast" airplane tour, but I definitely don't mind booking a Southwest flight...and enjoying a bag of pretzels, and an $8 glass of Gallo Chardonnay.
Air travel is amazing. And I can't wait to experience how it evolves within the next 20 years. Boeing is introducing both the Dreamliner and 747-8, and Airbus has its A380 - a plane even bigger than Boeing's.
But when it all comes down to it, air travel has become a staple of modern life. We can travel to New York or Hong Kong or Moscow in hours, and the only thing shorter is an Enterprise transporter - which is still a few years away. The world is getting smaller. And with each flight we realize that our world itself is a very small place. I look forward to the day when the departure screen says "To Infinity and Beyond," with destinations far away from Kubrick's 2001.
I'm even willing to fly an Air Koryo Stratocruiser, if it promises an aviation enthusiast's journey to the stars.
Again, I love air travel. I love everything about the experience. I love finding tickets online, getting up early to make a morning flight, and I love sitting by the window, watching the engines roar - and the wings find lift. Modern air travel is one of the things that makes me proud to be alive, and after watching 15 seasons of Air Crash Investigation, I'm confident that - whenever I board a plane - I'll arrive at my destination intact, rested, and holding a baggage voucher. I don't have the courage to attempt an Air Koyro "aviation enthusiast" airplane tour, but I definitely don't mind booking a Southwest flight...and enjoying a bag of pretzels, and an $8 glass of Gallo Chardonnay.
Air travel is amazing. And I can't wait to experience how it evolves within the next 20 years. Boeing is introducing both the Dreamliner and 747-8, and Airbus has its A380 - a plane even bigger than Boeing's.
But when it all comes down to it, air travel has become a staple of modern life. We can travel to New York or Hong Kong or Moscow in hours, and the only thing shorter is an Enterprise transporter - which is still a few years away. The world is getting smaller. And with each flight we realize that our world itself is a very small place. I look forward to the day when the departure screen says "To Infinity and Beyond," with destinations far away from Kubrick's 2001.
I'm even willing to fly an Air Koryo Stratocruiser, if it promises an aviation enthusiast's journey to the stars.
Plane travel, in the days before modern radar.